Wow... That was the most fucked up social event EVER!
So Grant, Becky and I met up with a few people in front of the school and we waited for others.
Let me see if I can list off everyone who was there... Me, Grant, Becky, Jade, Adam, Geoff, Greg, Katie, Andrew (F), Gavin, Gavin's friend Maurey, Jake, Marion, Andrew (C), Erica, 3 people I have never met before and don't remember the names of - and we were meeting up with Mal at the theatre. ...Geezus fucking christ! There was 18 of us - and more people were invited, too (ie, Steven and Sharlyn, mainly).
The first time they went to see a movie, I couldn't go with, but they were a "mob" of 10 people. The second time, I did go, and we were a "group" of 5. This time we were a fucking [i]gang[/i]! XD
Waiting for people to show up was fun; we were just goofing around in the sun (gaah, I'm gonna be so burnt tomorrow!) being freaky teenagers. Andrew, Greg and I chaced two gofers back into their holes, then I gave Greg a piggy-back ride back to the group. Then, a little while later, Andrew decided to jump on my back or something, and Katie pushed us over and he landed on me and I was just like "Dude... Ow."
Geoff, Jade, Greg and I went to the Quickie while we were wating for the bus to come to get slushies. Everyone mooched from us, and I paid for Gregs, but it was all good. They're cheap, so I don't care. XD
Aw man, it was so funny - we were standing at one stop and Gavin was like "If we run now, we can catch the 111 at the other stop over there... EVERYBODY, [i]RUUUN[/i]!!!" So we darted around the corner and across the street and caught it. lol! Imagine, 17 teenagers (Mal wasn't there yet) all bolting down the road - good times.
Everyone had to be divided up a bit on the bus, since there were only so many seats available, so Grant and I talked with Greg and Geoff about... I dunno, just random shit.
We got off at Lincoln Fields bus station and waited for the 85. It was only then that I found out why Marion was coming to the movie with us - she was Jake's little sister. That totally caught me by surprise. I had no idea! I hung out with her[i] brother[/i] before I hung out with her! Gaah! XP
On the 85 everyone just randomly quoted TV shows or web videos. "Hey kid! I'm a computer! Stop all the downloading! ...Help computers."
Mal met us at the intersection in front of the theatre, so I pulled her and Becky off to the side as everyone else went into the theatre so I could take the pictures. O...m...g... SOOO CUTE!!! They are going to turn out amazingly! *faints* I can't wait to develop them! *dances around*
We got our tickets and dicked around the arcade for a while before sitting down. We were spread out in 3 rows; Geoff, Mal, Grant and I were in the middle one. The movie started really cheesy-like, and I knew instantly I wasn't going to like it.
Grant joked about how the three vampire brides were "hot", but I didn't catch on that it was a joke, so at first I was pissed off (I just didn't say anything). But, as usual, my depression took over for me. Wonderful. I had my head down for the [i]entire[/i] movie ('cept for the first, like, 10 minutes maybe?). I just kept thinking to myself that I couldn't possibly compare to these fucking "perfect" girls, and that I'll always be something he had to settle on because he couldn't get a girl who looked like them.
It actually got to the point where I was in tears, considering going onto the roof of the Coloseum and just jumping. Not because of the comment, no, not anymore - but because I knew that no matter how hard I tried, I'll never change. I'm always going to be this "ugly" depressed girl, never getting any better. So, what's the point?
Ya, I'm fucked up. We know.
I decided I needed to hurt myself in some way. I remembered my most recent "accident" with the scissors, and decided to pick off the scab, since I didn't have my trusty scissors [i]with[/i] me. It didn't work, because picking off scabs doesn't hurt. So, I licked my hand and pressed it down - the salt on my hands stung, so it was all good.
Once the movie was over, Geoff took me off to the side to ask what was wrong. We ended up wandering outside, quite a bit aways from the "gang". I told him most of what I was thinking (minus the wanting to kill myself bit). I kept insulting myself, saying I was ugly; not because I was fishing for compliments, but because it was what I really believed. He made me feel about a thousand times better, and I decided to go back. He just kept telling me that I don't [i]have[/i] to compare, because I am me.
I'm so lucky to have him as a friend.
So yes, I returned to the group and walked right up to Grant. I just hugged him tightly as I sobbed slightly - we didn't let go for quite some time. Actually, as we were hugging, this girl we didn't know walked by us and said "Aw... Omg, that is so [i]cute[/i]!" After a while, he told me that his comment was a joke. He felt [i]so[/i] bad about it, too, because he didn't know that I'd react like that. Hell,[i] I[/i] didn't know I'd react like that.
He told me how worried he was about me, and I just felt so bad for over-reacting... Well, it wasn't like it was under any of my control - but I still felt terrible for making him worry like that.
We decided to sit down, and after a couple minutes of silence, he said "Would it fuck everything up even more if I told you I love you?" Omg... Time froze! I didn't expect that [i]at all[/i]. Obviously, I love him, too. I've been wanting to tell him for a while now, but I just didn't know how... I didn't even think he loved me!
*sighs*
We sat together for a little while longer, then re-joined the group. I was in a [i]much[/i] better mood now, so I was more or less back to being myself again hanging around with the freaks I call my friends XP.
Slowly the gang died, and everyone went home. Finally, it was just Grant, Gavin, Adam, Becky and I who were left to take a bus. Since Becky had to go in the other direction, she left. As for the rest of us, we realised that we had about 20 minutes until the bus came, so we crossed the street and went to the Quickie and I got some iced tea, and everyone else bought some sort of candy or chocolate. Got onto the bus, talked about random shit, then parted ways at Lincoln Fields.
Grant and I watched the 111 drive past us, and we didn't get on. We didn't think it was ours because it didn't say St.Laurent on it. Then we realised it would be about another 40 minutes until the next one got there (it came at midnight), and it was the last 111. Gaah! So we waited, and half way home Andrea gets on the bus. The freaky thing was I had mentioned to Grant when we passed Baseline Station that I might see her there because she's always taking busses at that time. Geezus christ, she got [i]on[/i] the bus and talked to us! Hahaha! Oh, go me and my psychic powers!
~oooOOOooo~
So now, here I am. I got home at about 12:15 - and it has taken me about 2 hours to write this. Kind of the opposite of my last blog, eh? XD
posted by: blacknaiad (reply)
post date: 05.16.04 (7:14 am)
SARAH I LOVE YOU TOO!! I mean, I'm no Grant, but ... either way DON'T let things like that get you down. If someone says something that may get you into one of your depression modes, SMACK THEM!! Just be like "Yo guy, shut yo mouth" lol. You are a beautfil, wonderful, smart, hillarious caring friend. You helped me through a lot and remember that I will always be here ready and willing (and probably forcing you to let me) help you. *LOVE*.
Reply to: blacknaiad
*hugs* yay! *love*love*
Aw, I'm so lucky I have such wonderful and caring friends... Thank you so much - you've been there for me a lot, and it means so much to me. ^^
posted by: juicebox (reply)
post date: 05.16.04 (12:22 pm)
sarah love, you're hot, but i love you.
<3
About Me:
Name: Sarah
DOB: Dec.01,'87 (16)
Location: Ottawa, ON
Likes: music, The Simpsons, That 70's Show, Stephen King, Tim Burton, horror movies, comedy, playing video / computer games, Monty Python, mexican food, iced tea, drawing, shopping, hanging out, swimming (alone), photography, acting, driving, and my friends and family ^^
Dislikes: assholes, whores, rap, musicals, when things break, liars, people who judge others before they get to know them, killing animals for food, working too hard... (thats all I can think of right now)
